without a net

the leap. the plunge. whatever you call it, i took it. this month, i quit my job. without having a new one lined up.

this was not an accident.

i have spent the previous year and a half in a state of ever-worsening depression and dissatisfaction with my life. symptoms, i’ve no doubt, manifested by not doing what i was made to do. it’s not that my job, in and of itself, was bad. i had just reached a point where i didn’t care anymore. i had stayed too long.

plus, that’s all it was to me: a job. it was not my passion. it was simply a paycheck. i had to get out.

but i was stuck.

my job became my prison. a place from which i was desperate to get away. but i refused to choose freedom. like so many others, i continued to choose the status quo. though i wanted to scream, i failed to act, choosing instead continued imprisonment.

so how did i become unstuck?

i’d love to share with you a riveting tale of inspiration and empowerment. one in which i had finally hit bottom, having grown tired of the tears, fears, excuses, and lack of fulfillment. one in which i looked myself in the mirror and said, “enough of this,” before going into work and telling my boss that i was leaving to pursue my dream.

and, i guess, that’s pretty much what i did.

honestly, though, it wasn’t as inspiring as all that. it was scary as hell. i had quit jobs before, but always with another one lined up. this decision would basically half our income and put us in a tight situation. “your happiness and sanity are more important to me than the money,” my wife told me.

so i did it.

after a year and a half of tears, fears, and stops all along the human emotional spectrum, i took the leap.

and you know what? once i acted, i felt a weight lift off my shoulders and my soul. i was free. even though i agreed to work about another month (so i’m still there for a few more weeks, actually) the constant anxiety and frustration is no longer there. i had acted and an end was in sight. a peace that of which i had not felt in a long time set upon my heart.

not coincidentally around the same time i started this blog and really got back into writing – which is what i was made to do. these past few weeks have been the best in a long, long time.

do you have a time when you felt stuck in your life? what did you do to become unstuck?